~ Kommentary by Kritter ~

I have friends from college who waitressed at different points during college, so they let it be known early on to TIP WELL. On top of that, my father-in-law is really great about tipping. He travels a lot, and he really notices when servers are particularly good, and he tips very generously. He said once that it's because he kept running into his sons' friends as employees, and wanted to be sure he helped 'em out by tipping enough.

So, we take our cue from him. We DO deduct for bad service, though. We recognize when a server is really busy and overworked and don't "penalize" for that, and most of the time, this isn't an issue. But there have been a couple of servers...

it may seem silly, but maybe this is one of the 'lessons' you are supposed to learn by working this job you hate. i have a friend who used to be a crappy tipper until i illustrated to her (by talking to the wait staff in her presence) that most of these people are working hard toward a goal and really benefit by a good tip. most are college students who literally need gas money or book money, etc. tipping well makes me feel like i am helping them just a little, toward accomplishing something great!

My sister used to be a waitress and she explained all this to me... that waiters and waitresses DEPEND on that tip money. Which should give them more incentive not to screw things up, but they should still get a tip regardless...

Of course it's an incentive not to screw up. But no one ever tries to screw up. When you have 15 bits of info floating in your head while pushing back through the crowd, gathering drinks and pushing back out, do you know how easy it can be to forget someone wanted a lemon on their free water? And knowing that to retrieve said lemon would take a monumental effort? And sometimes screwing up can literally be that while you are pushing buttons on the computer to input an order, it gets sticky and an additional button gets pushed. And sometimes the bartender makes the drink completely wrong. But you're the one who has to hear that from the customer and then fight with the bartender while they're slammed to fix it. And most of the time, I bring out the drinks as soon as they are made for me, but that can be a very long time depending on how crushed the bartenders are. What can I do? I can see Tanya's point about penalizing people who truly suck. Yeah, it happens. But I'd always try to give the benefit of the doubt because there's a 95% chance that there's way more going on than you know. Whether it be other things happening in the bar beyond their control or that they are having a bad night, just like anyone can for any number of reasons.

I agree it's important to tip appropriately. I've never waitressed myself, but I was a hostess in a Bennigan's one summer and got to know how important it was from the wait staff. When I feel I've received especially good service, I tend to be even more generous, too.

Very rarely, however, I will express in my tip that I felt the server was at fault for poor service. The time a waiter forgot about c2 and me, for example, and then LIED about it to our faces, saying the kitchen was just really backed up. After watching 4 tables be seated and order after us, then receive their food before we did, we spoke to the manager and explained our observations. I mean, the meter had to be fed before we were. He offered to take 10% off our bill. We still left a tip, but only the standard minimum percentage, on the reduced bill of course.

Stuff like that happens very rarely, though. About a month later, we were having dinner in another restaurant and our wonderful waitress explained that a large party's order had been put in just before ours, so our food might take a little longer. We appreciated her honesty and, absorbed in our conversation, didn't really notice the extra wait time. She got a great tip. :)

Manhattan Waiter used to be the best blog ever, before they stopped updating it.

http://blogs.salon.com/0003612/

I think anyone who has worked a crappy minimum wage job understands this. I wish I could have gotten tips at the movie theater. I try to tip 15% usually, maybe more for good service. That being said, I did go to breakfast the other day to do an interview for one of our publications. My boss and I only ordered two cups of coffee and some hash browns before our interviewee was ready. Bill was $4, I put down $6. It's only a little but that's like 50% and the poor guy wasn't going to get much from having us take up that table.

Also, if Aaron and I go out and charge the dinner on the credit card, I try to pay the tip in cash if I have the right change. Servers get taxed on reported credit card tips but not cash. Just something to keep in mind next time.

Oh, and tip cab drivers and pizza delivery guys good. They have to pay for gas out of their tip money and you know how bad gas prices are for you now. Imagine if your job depended on gas.

Tipping was something I knew little about growing up, because my family simply never went out to eat. I think I stiffed a number of waitresses in my early years because I didn't know I was supposed to tip them. I was later shocked to find people I knew tipping manicurists, hair stylists, etc. Made me wonder who all I should be tipping? Anyone who gives me a service? Do I tip the guy at Valvoline for changing my oil? I knew you were supposed to tip pizza boys only because that was the reason my father always gave for refusing to order delivery.
A tipping quirk that I picked up from my waitressing days was to tip in whole dollars. Change is annoying and heavy to carry around all night. I don't, however, agree with not putting a tip on the credit card. Wait staff is supposed to report and be taxed on all their tips, just because they are generally dishonest about that fact doesn't mean you should enable them.

Oh, and I also developed a little quirk about tipping strictly on %. Unlike most waitresses, it would seem, I didn't remember good tippers or bad tippers; I just didn't waitress long enough I guess. As a waitress, it often seemed to me that a customer who just came in and ordered a cup of coffee could be much more work than a family with a full meal. Tipped strictly by % seems to stop making sense. I still feel bad on occasion at say a Steak n Shake when I'm only tipping a dollar or so on a meal that cost less than $6. She didn't work any harder or less than a waitress who'd brought me sushi the night before.

Ok, I have been a server and a bartender in both a fancy establishment and a very busy city bar and I have to say that people generally are not good tippers. 10% - 15% is just not acceptable anymore. I had to pay rent and groceries off that tip money and I was on my feet a double shift that day to do it. 20% no less!

Second of all I just think that people aren't just bad tippers in the industry but they really enjoy feeling above someone. They love feeling waited on hand and foot like they are super important. And when you do that and a form a relationship with a customer and they tip you bad you get so frustrated because you are trying really hard. People love to be mean to you so they can feel more important about themselve. It is so frustrating when you have a degree and are probably smarter than your customer.

Last but not least...people with kids/large parties...Please be good to your servers. They are working double when you party is large and are trying their best to make sure your 15 glasses of soda are being refilled on time. Also if you have kids please don't let them make a mess at the table. It is just more work we have to do for our little $2.65 an hour.

Remember that when you are tipping...we only make $2.65 an hour!!

Hope this helps Kristen...trust me when I tell you I feel your pain. I hated waitstaffing in Chi Town. Those people sucked!

"I hated waitstaffing in Chi Town. Those people sucked!"

and that's why we don't want you here

Okay, so yeah, tip - knew that. used to be 10% standard, then 15% standard & now 20% standard - quite frankly I would prefer they just pay the waitresses and waiters a better hourly wage and just increase the price of food - but that is just me. I tip good waitresses & I usually tip poor waitresses worse and there have been instances where I did not tip at all for extremely poor service.

My question to you is: how do you treat poor tippers differently throughout the meal? How do you treat good tippers better? Quite frankly, all I want from a server is to bring my food out and bring my water out when I get there. I rarely want to see them again...I am not a big drinker of anything when I am eating so there are not lots of refills involved.

I have had boyfriends that rate the tips on how quickly their drink gets refilled - if they have to sit for a long time with an empty glass the tip percentage goes down - especially if it is not particularly busy.

I have been a server/bartender for two and a half years. Please remember, your server is taking your drink order and meal order, refilling your drinks, getting you more bread, but not always running(delivering) your food to your table. If you wanted extra dressing on your salad, nine times out of ten, it is on the ticket(your order that I have typed into the kitchen on a computer) However, foodrunners, and the person on the expo line (the other person that makes sure you have tarter sauce and a lemon, not to mention your au'jus and horseradish) don't always read the "ticket" correctly and will deliver the food incorrectly. Please do no not take that out on us. We do care if your food comes out correctly. We depend on it. Also, if you can afford to have booze with your meal, make sure you can tip. There is nothing tackier then a drinker that is so worried about saving a buck so they can have a beer or a glass of wine. If you tip shitty and then have the balls to come to the resturant again, believe me, everyone will know who you are. I do agree though, that if your server is shitty, and you do not honestly get good service, then you should talk to a manager.